Subject: [NEXTEL-1] The New Official Telecom Acronyms

From: [email-masked]
Date: Thu, 29 May 2003 15:23:41 -0400

3G [3rd Generation] 
     Gosh! Golly! Gee! 
     Gadgets Galore...Gradually ([email-masked]) 
     Girls, Gambling and Games! 
AHAG 
     Aha! How Authentically Goofed-up (adapted from [email-masked]) >
AMPS 
     Answering May Produce Static. 
     At least My Phone Still works ([email-masked]) 
     ...And Many Phones Scrapped (Masao Yamasawa, Japan) 
     ...And More Places Served (Masao Yamasawa, Japan) 
     Americans Must Prove Something ([email-masked], Cayman Islands) 
ALI 
     Addresses: Lost and Inconsistent 
ANI 
     Absolute Numbskull Indicator (adapted from [email-masked]) 
AOL 
     Acronym Overload Land 
ATIS 
     Alliance Taking It Slow ([email-masked], USA) 
BSP (Coating on Manuals) 
     Butt Sweat Protected (Stevve Adams, [email-masked]) 
BTTC 
     Boring, Tiring, Tedious and Cumbersome. 
CALEA 
     Cops And Lawmakers Eating Assets. 
     Criminals And Libertarians Each Abhor (it). 
CARNIVORE [FBI email sniffing system] 
     Copious Agents Reading Nearly Infinite Volumes of Redundant Emails 
 CCITT 
     Croissants & Coffee Interrupted by Technical Trivia. 
     Crazy Committee Interested in Travel & Talk 
     Call Collect If Totally Trapped (adapted from [email-masked]) 
CDMA 
     Could've Done More Arithmetic 
     Can't Determine Market Availability (C. Baldwin, [email-masked]) 
     Can Disconnect Mobiles Anywhere ([email-masked]) 
     Can't Dial in Most Areas ([email-masked]) 
     Cash Doesn't Matter Anymore ([email-masked]) ... or ... 
     Coverage Doesn't Matter Anymore ([email-masked]) ... or ... 
     Capacity Doesn't Matter Anymore (Masao Yamasawa, Japan) 
     Can Digital Match Analog (anonymous, from Australia, where digital (GSM and
CDMA) are replacing analog by
     government fiat) 
     Connecting Doesn't Mean Anything ([email-masked]) 
     Calls Drop Most Anywhere 
     Collisions Destroy Most Accesses (César del Pino, Spain) 
     Christian Dior Mobile Accessories ([email-masked]) 
     Customers Don't Mean Anything (Keith Horak) 
     Commercially Deployed and Miles Ahead (this one...) 
     Cleverly Designed to Maximize the Airwaves (...and following...) 
     Cool Data and Multimedia Applications (...are from...) 
     Customers Deserve More Airtime (...Qualcomm advertisements...) 
     Can Do Most Anything 
     Can't Do Much Anyway (Mak, England) 
CDPD 
     Capacity Did Prove Deficient. 
CIA 
     Can't Ice Anyone. 
CIBER 
     Cents Ignored By Eliminating Revenue. 
     Can It Bill European Roamers? (Jack Hwang, USA) 
CIO 
     Career Is Over ([email-masked]) 
CLEC 
     Can't Lose Enough Cash. 
CRTC 
     Canada's Reward for Tired Campaigners 
CTIA 
     Cancer Tales Inhibit Achievements. 
     Can't Take It Anymore 
DVD 
     Diminishing VCR Dominance 
EDGE 
     Enhanced Design to Go Erroneous ([email-masked]). 
ESN 
     Engineer Safer Numbering. 
ETSI 
     Eradicate TIA Standards Immediately (‘Q’). 
     European Travel and Sightseeing Initiative. 
     Existing Telecom Standards Insufficient (Harshawardhan Lele,
[email-masked], India) 
FCC 
     Funnel Cash to Congress 
     First Class Catastrophe 
     Forcing a CALEA Compromise 
     Frequently Causing Chaos (Telcordia Wireless Interconnect Class of May, 1999) 
     Friendly Candy Company (Telcordia August 1999 San Francisco Wireless Basics
Class) 
     Flippin' Calling-party-pays Controversy ([email-masked]) 
Gates, Bill 
     Greedy And Terrible Eater of Software Competitors, "Bullying Is Lotsa
Laughs". 
GPRS 
     Group of People Reading Specs (and doing nothing) ([email-masked], USA) 
     Gullible Punters Requiring Speed ([email-masked]) 
GPS 
     Great Plan for Spying 
     Going Places Slowly 
GSM 
     God Send Mobiles [c. 1992] 
     Gotta Start Making Money [c. 1993] 
     Giant Static Maker [c. 1994] 
     Got Services and MOU 
     Gone to Some other Method (C. Baldwin, [email-masked]) 
     Great Software Monster ([email-masked]) 
     Giant Software Mistake ([email-masked]) 
     Goodluck Sending Messages ([email-masked]) 
     God Save Motorola ([email-masked]) 
     Giant Signaling Machine ([email-masked]) 
     God Silence these Morons (Mike Belin, California) 
HLR 
     Here Lie Roamers 
     How Lost 'R u? ([email-masked]) 
IBM 
     It's Being Mended ([email-masked]) 
     I Believe in Mediocrity ([email-masked]) 
     I've Been Moved (Joe Walsh, [email-masked]) 
     Immature, But Marketable ([email-masked]) 
     It's Better done Manually (Alan McCreary, [email-masked]) 
     I Blame Microsoft (Krishna Prasad, [email-masked], India) 
iDEN 
     It Don't Enhance Nothin' 
     It Drops Every-call Now!
     I do Everything Nextel
IHA 
     I hate acronyms (Robert Pierce, USA) 
IIS 
     Impossible to Initiate Safely (Manuel Baselga, Spain) 
ILEC 
     Idiots Liking Excessive Charges (Telcordia Wireless Interconnect Class of
May, 1999) 
IMT-2000 
     It's Marketing Trying To (make us say) ooo! 
INTEL 
     I Never Took Engineering Lessons ([email-masked]) 
IMTS 
     Idiots Must Talk Somehow (Telcordia August 1999 San Francisco Wireless Basics
Class) 
ISDN 
     Innovation Subscribers Don't Need 
     Internet Saved d'ere Neck 
     It Still Does Nothing ([email-masked]) 
     Ich Sehe Das Nicht ([German version] [email-masked]) 
     I Smell DeutcheMarks Now! ([email-masked]) 
     I See Dollars Now (Phil Audino, ETRI) 
     It Sometimes Does Network ([email-masked]) 
     I Still Don't Know ([email-masked]) 
     I Suspect Dubious Nomenclature ([email-masked]) 
     Invention Sucks Dollars Nicely ([email-masked]) 
ISO 
     Illegible Software Ordinances (Manuel Baselga, Spain) 
     Invariably Soon Outdated (Manuel Baselga, Spain) 
     Infinite Sheet Organizers (adapted from Manual Baselga, Spain) 
IT 
     Idiotic Torturers 
     Insolent Terrorists 
ITU 
     Impossible To Understand ([email-masked]) 
     It's Totally Useless ([email-masked]) 
     It Troubles You ([email-masked]) 
LANP 
     Let's Ask Next Person (Telcordia Wireless Interconnect Class of May, 1999) 
LATA 
     LEC Ain't Toting Across (Telcordia Wireless Interconnect Class of May, 1999) 
     Leave A Telco Alone (Telcordia Wireless Interconnect Class of May, 1999) 
     Long Awaited Technical Assistance ([email-masked]) 
     Local Access Telephones Arbitrarily (Manuel Baselga, Spain) 
LEC 
     Losing Existing Customers (Telcordia Wireless Interconnect Class of May,
1999) 
LERG 
     Let Everyone Rage & Groan (Telcordia Wireless Interconnect Class of May,
1999) 
     Let Everyone Really Guess (Telcordia Wireless Interconnect Class of May,
1999) 
LIDB 
     Looking Into Dead Beats (Terrie Tyler, Hewlett Packard) 
LMDS 
     Lucrative Method for Delivering Service (Tim Kridel, Wireless Review
Magazine) 
LNP 
     Lost Network Performance. 
     Lotsa Nervous People 
     Lots of Network Problems (Michele Young, YoungIdeas) 
LRIC 
     Low Rate Incumbent Cash-flow (Telcordia Wireless Interconnect Class of May,
1999) 
Macintosh 
     Most Applications Crash. If Not, The Operating System Hangs
([email-masked]) 
     Many Anguished Customers, Mostly Academic and Clueless ([email-masked]) 
MCSE 
     Must Call Someone Experienced ([email-masked]) 
Microsoft 
     Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only Fools Teenagers
([email-masked]) 
     Methodically I Copy and Reproduce Original SOFTware
([email-masked]) 
     Must I Continually Repulse Offensive Snubs, Outrages and Foolish Taunting? 
MIN 
     (there's) Money In Numbers ([email-masked]) 
MMS 
     Mangled My Snapshots 
MSA 
     Mostly Static Area 
MOS 
     Marketing Office Silliness ([email-masked], USA) 
MSC 
     Must Send Cash ([email-masked]) 
NAMPS 
     Not All Mobile Phones Suck ([email-masked], Cayman Islands) 
NANP 
     Not Another New Phone-number! ([email-masked]) 
     Network Administrators Never Panic ([email-masked]) 
     Not Another Numbering Plan! (Telcordia August 1999 San Francisco Wireless
Basics Class) 
NMT (Scandinavian originated analog cellular) 
     Nokia's Money Tree 
     No More Troubles ([email-masked]) 
     Nice Moments Together ([email-masked]) 
NSA 
     No Such Agency 
     Never Say Anything ([email-masked]) 
     Nasty Silence Abroad (adapted from [email-masked]) 
     Nursing Security Ailments ([email-masked]) 
     No Secrets Anymore 
NTSC 
     Not Twice the Same Color ([email-masked]) 
PAL 
     Peace At Last ([email-masked]). 
PCIA 
     PCS Couldn't Increase Admissions. 
PCMCIA 
     People Can't Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms ([email-masked]) 
     Pretty Crappy Micro-Computer Inspired Acronym ([email-masked]) 
PCS 
     Pretty Cool Stuff. [c. 1990] 
     Plagiarized Cellular Standards. [c. 1993] 
     Piles of Confusing Standards ([email-masked]) 
     Prettymuch Cellular Service ([email-masked]) 
     Plentya Cash for Spectrum. [c. 1995] 
     Purchased Cellular Service ([email-masked]) 
     Pray for Cash from Sheiks [c. 1997] 
     Please Connect Sometimes! ([email-masked]) 
     Push Cloned Service 
     Pretty Cruddy Service (a happy customer) 
     Particularly Crappy Service (Aaron Ayling, US Cellular) 
PDC (Japanese digital cellular standard) 
     Perfect Domestic Connection (Masao Yamasawa, Japan) 
     Please Don't Crash ([email-masked]) 
     Please Dial Cautiously ([email-masked]) 
PLMN 
     Pay Lotsa Money Now ([email-masked]) 
PSAP (Emergency call answering point) 
     Please Serve All Promptly (adapted from [email-masked]) 
     Politicians Scream At Problems 
RCMP 
     Red Canadians Manhandling with Pepper 
RSA 
     Rural Static Area (Telcordia Wireless Interconnect Class of May, 1999) 
     Reasonably Secure Access 
     Rarely Served Adequately 
SID 
     Some Idiot's Decision ([email-masked], Cayman Islands) 
     Say It's Domestic (Manual Baselga, Spain) 
SMDS 
     Small Men in Dancing Shoes ([email-masked]) 
SMS 
     Save My Soul ([email-masked]) 
     Simply Mobile Spam ([email-masked]) 
     Splintered Message Supply 
     Save Money Slowly ([email-masked]) 
SNAFU 
     Silly Nations Allow Frequency Uncoordination 
SNMP 
     Simply Not My Problem (Edward Bill - [email-masked]) 
     Say Nicely, "More Pornography!" ([email-masked]) 
SS7 
     Signaling Sins: 7 (Manual Baselga, Spain) 
SSP 
     Service Screw-up Point ([email-masked]) 
TCAP 
     Telecommunications Capability Appears Poor ([email-masked]) 
TDMA 
     The Dumb Man's Analog ([email-masked]) 
     Turns Delicate Machines Autistic. 
     Too Dumb to Move Aside (Cliff Baldwin - [email-masked]) 
     Though Digital, May Be Antiquated (‘Q’) 
     Technical Disaster Mixed with Analog ([email-masked]) 
     Too Damn Many Acronyms 
TIA 
     Titles In Abeyance. 
TELECOM 
     This Euphoric, Least Effective Career Of Mine (Mike Belin, California) 
     Tired Euphemism for Lazy, Egotistical, Crazy Old Managers (Mike Belin,
California) 
TETRA 
     The Endless Try to Reach Agreement (Giuseppe Scarpi, Italy). 
TLA 
     Three Letter Acronym ([email-masked]) 
TTFN 
     Ta Ta For Now! ([email-masked], USA) 
URL 
     Unable to Readily Locate 
     Unable to Register Lately ([email-masked]) 
UWB 
     Un-Wanted Bursts 
UWCC 
     Used to Want CDMA to Crash 
     Un-Wanted Consortium Collapses 
VLR 
     Visitors (please) Leave Rightaway ([email-masked]) 
     Visitors Lie Repeatedly 
WAP 
     Win Another Problem ([email-masked]) 
     Windows Abandons PCs ([email-masked]) 
     Wear A PDA ([email-masked]) 
     Where Are the Phones? ([email-masked]) 
     What! Another Protocol? 
WiFi 
     With Inadequate Fortifications against Intruders 
WIN 
     Wreck IS-41 Now! 
     Wow! It's New! 
WNP 
     Worst Number Problems (Telcordia Wireless Interconnect Class of May, 1999) 
WWW 
     World Wide Wait 
     Wait, Wait, Wait (Michel Houde, [email-masked]) 
     Warm Waffles Wanted (Ricardo Baudin, Telefonica Moviles, Spain) 
     Wonderful Windows Waiting (Masao Yamasawa, Japan) 
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