Subject: [Simple] MSRP Comments - nits

From: Aki Niemi <[email-masked]>
Date: Thu, 16 Oct 2003 18:56:00 +0300

Hi,

Here are some nits found for MSRP.

Regards,
Aki

---

- Title needs to be spelled out. Maybe talk about MSRP there, too.

- Abstract: need to spell out SDP and SIP.

- Chapter 1, 1st paragraph, last sentence: page-mode -> Page-mode.

- Ch 5.1, last para., first sentence: "...purpose in that the..."
                                                       ^^^^ -> they

- Ch 5.2, 1st para., 1st sentence: "...long messages on a..."
                                                   ^^^ -> in

- Ch 6.1, 3rd p., 2nd s.: "...indicates that the endpoint is may be..." 
remove "is"

- Ch 6.2, 3rd p., ABNF doesn't allow "timeout" in "both", only in "passive".

- Ch 6.3, 1st p., 3rd s., "Occasionally and endpoint..."
                                         ^^^ -> an

- Ch 6.3, 3rd p., last s., "...both as a root body, or..."
                                                     ^^^ -> and

- Ch 6.4, 1st p., 2nd s., "...that is, contains a direction..."
                                       ^ -> insert "it"

- Ch 6.4, 2nd p., last s., "meeting" -> "meaning"

- Ch 6.5, 2nd p., 1st s., remove ";" from URL

- Ch 7.2, some of the ABNF goes over 72 char lines.

- Ch 7.4.1, bullet 4, remove double-quote after 3rd sentence

- Ch 7.4.1, 2nd set of bullets, p. after bullet 3, 1st s., "...must 
choose whether of act..."
                ^^ -> to

- Ch 7.4.4, 1st p., last s., "...or an a relay."
                                     ^^ -> on

- Ch 7.4.4, 2nd p., 4th s., "...be sent host connection..."
                                        ^ insert "on the"

- Ch 7.4.6, 1st p., 4ts s., "The connection hosting device..."
                                            ^ insert "between the"

- Ch 7.5.1, 1st p., remove extra period at the end.

- Ch 7.5.1, 2nd p., 1st s., "...constructs session URL."
                                           ^ the

- Ch 7.5.1., 3rd bullet, "Expire" -> "Exp"

- Ch 7.5.1, 2nd set of bullets, 2nd bullet, 3rd s.,
"...not duplicate URL..."
                  ^ any

- ..., 4th s., "...connect over a point..."
                                   ^^^^^ port

- Ch 7.5.1, 2nd set of bullets, 3rd bullet, delete extra "section"

- Ch 7.5.4, 7th bullet, "...subsequent arriving on...
                                       ^ requests

- Ch 7.9.3, 1st p., 1st s., extra words "...endpoint to respond to 
offer..."                                               ^^^^^^^^^^

- Ch 10.2, 1st para., 4th line, "...to acquire session URL..."
                                               ^ the

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